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Diary Of A New Mum -
Week 17
Kids, Kids And More Kids
This weekend my friend from where I
lived before I got married came up to stay with us. My friend, Maria, happens to
have three children – aged 10 months, 3 years and 10 years. All girls. We had a
barbeque on Friday night (the weather held out – probably because we spent a
fortune on a gazebo just in case it rained).
So, picture the scene. There’s
Jessica-Ann, lying on her play-mat, looking angelic as always in her best pink
outfit I’d been saving for a special occasion. Next to her on the floor is
Sophie, 10 months and just starting to crawl. (It was weird because Sophie is
clearly still a baby but next to Jess she looked HUGE!) Hovering over both of
them, looking for trouble, is 3 year old Elle – into everything and already
pretty vocal. And sitting on the sidelines, trying to look as though she isn’t
interested in any of it, Lily. A teenager ahead of time, tall for her age and
very intelligent.
It was like seeing all the stages of
girlhood lined up side by side. I could see what my baby would be like at each
age – size, sounds, attitude! All Maria’s kids are impeccably behaved, and she
has the same views as I do on routine (which was a big relief). I felt like it
was also a kind of dress-rehearsal for what it will be like having a toddler
around the place – rubbing dirty little hands against doors, crashing into
tables full of glasses of red wine.
My sister came along too, and she was
more stressed than I was! But then, she’s a lot more house proud than me. I just
thought, Oh well, if something gets broken or ruined it will be one less thing
to worry about when Jess is crawling.
Not that I had to worry. Maria’s kids
were perfect. And it got me thinking about how different we are today than in,
say, my own childhood. When I was a kid we didn’t have stair gates. Or padded
stuff to wrap around sharp edges of furniture (yes, some parents really do
this). Or special child-proof locks for the kitchen cupboards. We were told No
to the things we weren’t to do, and if we went ahead and did them anyway we
suffered the consequences.
Say ‘suffer the consequences’ today and
you risk being branded as a neglectful, evil parent. You might run the risk of
having your kids taken off you! We’re told we have to cosset them, wrap them in
cotton wool, remove the slightest, remotest chance that they might hurt
themselves. Is this really necessary?
Don’t get me wrong – I plan to do
everything in my power to protect my precious little one from harm. Goes without
saying. But shouldn’t there be a way to do this without having to create an
unreal environment for them to grow up in? After all, the day will one day come
when they find themselves on stairs without gates, or in kitchens without door
locks. How on earth are they going to cope?
Diary of a New Mum Week 33
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